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Standing in Relief

from Watership Down by Opie's Funeral

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lyrics

“Who wants to hear about brave deeds when he’s ashamed of his own, and who likes an open, honest tale from someone he’s deceiving?” cCh. 17)

Could I tell you a secret? I daily deal in deception and lies
Oh I can never get any relief
And to be clear I was raised up right (walk by faith and not by sight) but I am on my own now can't you see

“Could I beg you for a smoke?” was a question I oft used to quote; now here I sit in sullen self-restraint
And ain’t it something, this path I chose? Move by instinct and follow my nose; so treat me like the lapdog that I am

Oh it's so easy to make this right, look to the light, take my life off the line

I need something to hold on to — a steady lover; a creed or two — and, wavering, I’ll take my first real step
Not to sell myself short: I’m accustomed to pain; the bending of love and the breaking of faith. Oh I could use a week spent in poor health

Oh it’s not always easy to get it right, keep your sight, live your life out of a mystery

Someday soon I’ll sink again into the depression of my unmade bed; it holds me like an anxious mother’s wrap
And I'll tell you this it's unnerving to see my shame growing stronger the more I achieve. Well, I have looked that gift horse in its mouth

Oh, it’s never easy to make it right, read the signs, look at your life: I would hate me! Well, that’s not right. Give it another try. I am full of surprise. This is not what I would have expected of life.

All too often I try to hide from myself but shine a light and here I am, I'm standing in relief

credits

from Watership Down, released March 21, 2020

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Opie's Funeral Chilliwack, British Columbia

Project of Caleb van der Leek: singer-songwriter; teacher; husband; pilgrim

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